How To Develop Self Confidence In 5 steps

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how to develop self confidence

Having little or no self confidence is a really big issue for many people and for those who do want to make changes and improve their lives, it can be virtually impossible to envisage themselves actually getting there. This begs the question…how do you get from point A (having no self confidence) to point B (discovering true self confidence)? The reality is that confidence isn’t something that can be gained overnight, instead it takes dedication, realization and acceptance. Let’s take a look…

Step 1 – Know your insecurities

The first initial step in learning how to develop self confidence is to understand what it is that makes you insecure. It could be past experiences, whether they be negative or traumatic, the way that you look, or even past regrets. Whatever they are, try writing them down on paper and pinning them up somewhere prominent like a bedroom wall or notice board. Not until you know what they are, can you begin to tackle them.

Step 2 – Talk it over

Talk over these points with friends or close relatives. Bringing them to the fore and addressing the issues means that you are chipping away at them. If it’s a negative or bad past experience, is it relative in your life today? If it’s something more physical it doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to banish it to move on. Instead try to be accepting of it without necessarily thinking of the issue as wrong or bad. Mulling the points over, will help to resolve them. When you feel better about them, or no longer view them as bad, then cross them off on your list. That act of doing this symbolizes that the problem is no longer and that you are ready to move on.

Step 3 – People make mistakes

The realization that it’s okay to make mistakes plays a big part in developing self confidence. No one is perfect and even the most confident of people have insecurities at some stage or other. However they aren’t constant and learning that these feelings come and go, and that anyone can bounce back from them, is key to moving on.

Step 4 – Change your mindset

If you’ve never tried meditation before, then now is the time. Meditation can help with so many aspects of the holistic self and on so many levels. If you’re wondering how to develop self confidence through meditation, and more importantly why it works, then try a little light meditation. Find yourself a quiet room, block out all the noise, completely relax and breath in and out deeply. When we do this we start to turn Beta brainwaves (our normal everyday waking state where insecurities, stress and anxiety linger) into Alpha brainwaves. This is where we experience a sense of peace, harmony and comfort. In this state phobias and insecurities melt away and it then makes it easier to focus on the positive side of you. This could be what you excel at, or what your best attributes are. Knowing that you can do this any time, means that you are in control of your feelings and not the other way around.

Step 5 -Be positive and be thankful

Now that you know that you can control these feelings and they aren’t permanent, try to entertain positive thoughts. Think about how you can affect your future and progress and imagine yourself being where you really want to be. If you’ve got it..then why not flaunt it! Tell others about your strengths and qualities and by doing this it will reinforce this notion and encourage growth. In addition be thankful. In many aspects, a lack of self confidence can often be caused by a lack of something. Whether this be material things like money, a car or a house or rather emotional things such as love. Ty focusing on the things that you do have in your life and this will combat the feeling of being unfulfilled and dissatisfied.

In essence knowing how to develop self confidence is akin to going on an unfamiliar journey. It may start off very confusing and you’ll probably get a little lost, but once you know and understand the way, it becomes much easier to navigate and therefore won’t seem so scary.


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