Don't miss

Dealing with Bereavement and Loss: 5 Proactive Things You Can Do

By Operation Meditation

We all experience grief and loss at certain points in our lives. Losing someone is inexorable—maybe you can delay it, but you can’t really stop it. It is part of being alive. Successfully dealing with bereavement and loss, therefore, is a matter of understanding or looking at your situation from a realistic perspective, and approaching it proactively. It is not easy to overcome grief, but it is possible—all you have to do is have the heart to deal with it and look at it in the eye, so to speak. The following five proactive ways of dealing with grief have been tried and tested and have been shown to help people manage an emotionally difficult situation.

1. Face your grief

The worst thing you can do is running away from your grief. And by “run” we don’t necessarily mean you actually run away, but rather, escaping through self-defeating methods such as substance abuse (alcohol or drugs). The tackiest of Hollywood movies seem to “teach” us that when you’re overcome with grief, the best thing you can do is drowning out your sorrows with booze and hard liquor. Nothing can be farther from the truth. Instead, you must not deny your grief and face it—cry if you must, take time alone if you need to be, say goodbye and cry some more. You should even smile, especially when you remember the good memories. Let your emotions guide you and don’t be too hard on yourself. Don’t bottle it all up inside—while you shouldn’t say you’re alright when you’re not, don’t announce your grief at every opportunity. Just don’t engage in risky behavior that would endanger you—for instance, do not drive angry or take out your negative feelings on someone, especially your loved ones.

2. Learn to accept

Grief does not go away immediately and healing takes time. There is no set schedule when it’s over as it differs from person to person and the kind of magnitude of the particular loss, but accepting that these things happen—accepting it on a deep, emotional level—is winning half the battle.

3. Engage in fruitful activities

It’s not helpful if you’d just drop everything and curl up in your room for days on end. Rather, in dealing with bereavement and loss, try your best to take your mind away from your grief and do something fruitful, especially activities that help other people. Volunteer in your church or local socio-civic groups, participate in feed the poor programs, teach young kids, or maybe join a book reading club.

4. Socialize

As we’ve always said, man, by nature, is a social animal. We all need others—friends, acquaintances—in order to cope successfully even with the most massive endeavor of navigating through the black alleys of bereavement. Despite the private nature of most of our losses, we don’t have to face our grief alone. Share it with someone, especially with those who truly empathize with you. Moreover, just by being with people is enough—even if you’re feeling not up to it, try to attend gatherings and talk to people. You can even participate in support groups that deal with grief.

5. Engage in meditation

Dealing with bereavement and loss can be more successfully done with the use of proper meditation. As you probably know, meditation has been shown even in scientific research to elevate the mood and alleviate depression and other psychological and spiritual issues, not to mention the strictly physical neurological ones. Proper meditation works by altering the brainwave patterns to your own benefit—it helps melt away your sadness and grief, gives you a deep sense of comfort and peace, and basically strengthens or enhances the effects of your other coping mechanisms.

Try For Free